[ P ] We'll Hold Each Other Soon

The silvered brute, welcomed her closeness, lifting a forearm and wrapping her up into an embrace where he nuzzled into her cheek. She returned the gesture, feeling the warmth had risen in his cheeks and wondered if he could feel hers, or if he could even feel the pounding of her heart as she could feel his. The silence stretched for a time as Merrin leaned into him, and she was just beginning to wonder whether her words had been too much or if they'd been received well at all, when the deep tenor of his voice resonated in their dark cave of crystals.

"I love you."

Merrin's eyes flickered up towards him as they met nose to nose. There was a mixture of emotions held in the gentle hues of her eyes. The caring presentation of his gift, follow by his admission had somehow turned her word upside down. A moment ago she'd tossed the word 'love' about as an endearing name without even thinking of it. What was it about the way he'd said it here and now that seemed to halt time completely and force her into snippets of time where the same word echoed from her past? Her mind worked to comprehend the truth behind the meaning in what had just been spoken.

'Love' was a word used by her mother...it was said to have been the reason behind everything the woman had ever done...to her...to her children. Everything had been for her own good. The phrase 'I do this for you, because I love you.' was a cold and detached justification for actions that any sane wolf would have deemed heartless and cruel.

'Love' was what she and her betrothed were supposed to have had between each other...according to her mother. The man became her husband and he'd said it perhaps once, maybe twice, but when he had...all that she could recall was fear in response to feeling cornered and the pain of his abuses that had taken a toll on her physically and mentally.

No, no, no... Merrin didn't want to be here anymore, reliving the experiences with ghosts that continued to steal away from a live she was truly living. She wanted to be back in the cave of wonders, back in Luciel's arms where she had never ever felt that bleak hopelessness and the numbness that followed the false preachings of 'love'. The woman tore and clawed at these images attempting to repeat themselves within her skull.

She ruthlessly ripped them all down to replace them with...a meadow where a large, fluffy figure introduced himself as Argent....an afternoon nap in the heat of Summer beneath a tree on a hot day...the surprise of a lakeside picnic and the gentle smile of a handsome gray face she learned to call Luciel...the discovery of a mysterious structure hidden in the woods...splashing and laughter of child-like youth among the braids of rivers...a roaring waterfall with a hidden secret behind its veil...a cave of an array of glowing crystals surrounding her...and a man who loved her...truly loved her...motivating her to clamber back to a pair of dazzling silver eyes that lit the way back to him, back home.

What had felt like an eternity to Merrin, appeared as the blink of an eye for Luciel. She suddenly began to feel faint, her legs trembling before they lost the will to support her properly and she toppled up against him. Her head felt light as a feather and she felt as though she had to catch her breath, her maw parted with quick pants that she attempted to steady herself with her mate graciously acting as her anchor.

@Argent

table ; bunny - - art ; Raven

LA.
fall on your sword...

Argent could sense something was wrong when her eyes met his. There was a glassiness that overtook the sparkle of her lilac gaze, sucking the life and luster out of them. She was looking at him, but he could tell she was not present. It was something he had seen before with soldiers after the war. They were dragged inwards, experiencing the horror of combat all over again. He felt the same sensation pulling him from reality when confronted with a medic. Memories of traumatic pain and pressure splitting through his chest. Argent held her steady, lifting his muzzle to lap gently at her brow in an effort to bring her back to awareness. "Merrin?" he called her name, brow furrowed into a worried frown.

Then suddenly she was back, but the strain on her body was evident. She fell against him and he was quick to cushion her head against his chest. "I've got you," he assured her, touching his nose to her cheek. He let her lean on him for as long as she needed to while she recovered her strength. "It's okay," he softly murmured, trying to soothe her as he nuzzled into her cheek.

He didn't know what else to do other than hold her and murmur comforting words into her ears. To show her the love that she deserved, that she should have always known.

code by claerie

Her crash landing back to the present could have been more graceful, to be sure. As she fell into the enduring form of her mate, he was beyond attentive holding her when she lacked the strength to do so herself. She turned her face to bury it in his chest, closing her eyes as she let warmth envelope her, ear flicking lightly while listening to the deep lulling tone of Luciel's soothing words.

Her trembling slowly ceased, muscles relaxing where they were pulled that, and she slowly withdrew her face from it's hiding place. Shaking her head back and forth, her lips turning downward into a small frown. "I-I'm sorry... Trying to make light of the situation she let out a breath of a laugh, avoiding his gaze. "I'm fairly certain this is...more than you signed up for..."

@Argent

table ; bunny - - art ; Raven

LA.
fall on your sword...

Argent felt her sodden form shaking against his chest and he felt a wave of anger towards whoever had hurt her like this. To make her afraid to hear the words 'I love you'. It was abhorrent. He knew that he would have to take care with those words now that he knew they were a source of pain for her. Maybe he could use a different word, something that wasn't tainted by bad memories. "You don't have to be sorry. It's not your fault," he insisted, shaking his head at her apologies. "I want to help. Whatever you need," Argent assured her, wanting her to know that no matter what he still cared and he was staying by her side.

If she wanted to carry on looking at crystals with him then he would happily go along with that if a distraction was what she needed. He was also there to listen if she needed to talk about anything. He wasn't the best conversationalist, but he was a good listener. Being the quiet type had taught him to observe rather than give input and sometimes that came in handy. Regardless he was there to hold her for as long as she needed his comfort.

code by claerie

The truth and sincerity bled through in the words he spoke. It was a difficult thing to process...that her mate had wanted to help and care for her without anything in return. The sentiment was as moving as it was concerning to the woman he held close to him. The more time they'd spent together, the more prevalent the deep seeded roots of her past traumas became. She'd ultimately feared this...and had hoped in vain that she would've had more time before it all crept back in to take control of her once more. Luciel would discover she was not worth the trouble and would leave her, for he surely deserved better than the fragile broken pieces she was made of.

That thought alone tore her insides to bits and she slowly rested her head against his chest, a single tear rolling down her cheek. Merrin suddenly recalled the gift, the purple crystal he'd pulled from the bunch before he'd softly murmured of his love. She became frantic for a brief moment, turning about and feeling around on the rough grooves of the cavern floor until her paw bumped into something that gave a clattering sound as it skidded slightly over the rock. She scooped it up and pulled it into her chest just next to her heart, drawing herself back against the string build of the Captain at her side and closing her eyes with a sigh.

After a time, she finally spoke, trying to still the wavering of emotion in her tone. "Luciel...thank you..." She swallowed the lump forming in her throat. "...for...for showing me what love is...I have not had very many good examples in my life...but please, please know that...my heart beats so wildly just at the mere sight of you, I never go a moment in my day without you on my mind, all I ever long for is for you to be close to me...to hold me...to kiss me..." Merrin clutched the crystal tightly, her cheeks warming as she nervously glanced up at him.

"You are my rising sun...and my glowing moon...you are...absolutely everything to me...and if...if this is the definition of love...then yes, Luciel Argent, I love you too...I am so deeply in love with you..." She felt tears dripping from her face, unsure when she'd started crying through all of this. She could only imagine how overwhelmed she must have made the this poor man and she turned her face away with embarrassment after pouring out everything she felt for him.

@Argent

table ; bunny - - art ; Raven

LA.
fall on your sword...

Argent knew she was hurting deeply and only hoped that his words helped in some way with her healing. He knew that part of it was to do with her mother and her marriage. People that should have loved her had instead mistreated her. It made his heart ache for her, that his inexperienced attempts at romance were the only example of true love that she had experienced. His eyes shined with emotion and he felt a sudden longing to hold her tight and never let her go. In response to her words he lapped at her cheek, giving her all the kisses she wanted. ”You can have that. I’m not going anywhere. Whatever happens I want to be there,” he promised, happy to shower her with affection for as long as it took to make her smile again.

Her skill with words never failed to flatter or fluster him and he might have ducked his head in embarrassment had he not been more concerned with the tears soaking her damp cheeks. It was an emotional confession and one with glowing praise that he wasn’t entirely sure he deserved, but he was happy to be viewed in such a way by someone so precious to him. ”I feel the same. I wasn’t sure… after the war if I’d be happy again. I thought my life was over, but… now I know it’s just starting… with you,” he tried his best to relay to her how important she was in his own gruff way. She was the reason for his happiness, his joy and she was his future.

”I love you,” he repeated the words more softly this time, touching his nose to a cheek that tried to hide away from him.

code by claerie

Luciel's gentle kisses at her cheeks successfully charmed a small smile upon her cheeks She breathed out a shaky sigh of relief to hear his affirmations and snuggled closer to him. Merrin would simply have to remind herself that he wanted to be there with her and for her when she was vulnerable. They seemed miniscule now...those many times she had watched and listened to the footfalls of someone leaving her to her own devices when she'd grown weary.

Speaking her deepest feelings for Luciel aloud alleviated much of the crushing pressure she'd managed to bear. It was a mixture of shoving the negative energies from her form as much as it was, letting her aura surround her with this revitalizing warmth that took its place and spread throughout her being. Her mate had even found words to expand on his own emotion when it came to their relationship. Shimmering lilac pools sought his own as he relayed his own struggle with darkness in his life. He was a light for her as much as she was one for him...again the three words were whispered softly at her cheek.

Merrin felt as though her breath were stolen from her as it hitched to hear the words gain. This time, however, they felt different...she understood what they were from another viewpoint. She turned back towards the silvered male, feeling and hearing the way her heartbeat surged with this intrinsic knowledge that their very souls had been meant for one another. "And I love you...in this life and the next..."

She was able to return the sentiment more confidently along with her own promise to him that she meant with ever fiber of her being. She allowed her paw to lower the crystal to the ground and off to the side before realigning her attention on her beloved, closing her eyes and rasping her tongue slowly across his muzzle to return his affections.

@Argent

table ; bunny - - art ; Raven

LA.
fall on your sword...

The day had been one of discovery, of new places and feelings explored. Argent felt the day's events catching up with him. Both physically and mentally he was worn out, but his heart felt full. He was sure that Merrin must be even more exhausted with the emotional distress she had endured. Still he did not want to part from her side and undo their loving cuddle even if it meant returning to a warm and dry nest. The moment was all that mattered to him and he wouldn't let it end until Merrin wanted him to let go. She needed him by her side and he was content to stay there.

"And I love you...in this life and the next…" Her sweet words caused heat to flush through to his cheeks and a smile touched his lips when she returned his affection. The natural puffiness of his cheeks was slowly returning as her tongue lapped over the shaggy locks. "Always," he murmured in agreement, fully committed to being her mate for life and after too if there was one. He didn't need a wedding to know that she was his life partner. Her freedom had been taken away once before by a marriage, one that had left a lasting mark upon her heart. As far as Argent was concerned as long as Merrin was happy nothing needed to change between them.

He waited for a gap between the kisses to surprise her with some of his own. Taking great care to groom her cheeks and dry the tears that had soaked them. "Uh.. Merrin? Do you want to stay over tonight?" he asked, as nervous as a pup asking for a sleepover. He was anxious to stay with her and the thought of her returning to the barracks without him saddened him. The cabin they had found together was close enough that she wouldn't be late for her morning patrol and they could spend a little more time together.

code by claerie

'Always' The words felt as though they resounded across time and space, throughout her body, mind, and soul...as if she'd heard them before. Perhaps then, that's why neither of them worried the other with such sentiments being used too soon. They'd met in the Spring and by the Fall, they were whispering promises beyond lifetimes to one another. It felt...right...in fact, whenever she peered up into the bright silver hues of his orbs, her heart skipped a beat as she somehow viewed him in a different light. 'There you are...' Her soul would say to his as they finally recognized the other.

Merrin welcomed a series of Luciel's gentle kisses, closing her eyes and releasing a soft hum as he wiped away the stain of tears upon her cheeks. Her ears swiveled forward towards him, her brows raising, though her eyes remained closed as the deep and soothing timbre of his voice rumbled next to her. The touch of uncertainty to his tone as he spoke her name caused her to open her eyes and look to him with mild concern. "Yes?" His inquiry brought an instant wagging to her tail behind her before she even gave him an answer. His sheepish nature when speaking with her on some subjects was one of her favorite qualities about him.

"I would be most appreciative of that, honestly. I...ehm, don't think I could return to the barracks in this state..." She cringed at the thought of the other soldiers seeing this side of her that was strictly reserved for the man who held her heart. "If that's alright with you, that is...I would also hate to overstep my bounds, Luciel..." Merrin wanted to be very clear from the start, that when that cabin in the woods had been claimed, it had been done so under the name 'Luciel Argent', documented as his property. She hadn't wanted to intrude on his new home that he had settled into, especially in the early stages of their relationship. So this invitation was another big step for the two of them and she wished to be respectful although in this moment, separating herself from her beloved was an unbearable thought.

@Argent

table ; bunny - - art ; Raven

LA.
fall on your sword...

It would be the first time they would be spending the night together and he was relieved when she accepted the invitation. He had been a little worried that it might be a bit too much. Which was a silly thought considering they'd just declared they were in love and promised to stay together for life, but he wanted to be considerate of her boundaries. Every new milestone was a new experience for Argent. He wasn't sure what was appropriate for the current stage of their relationship. He was going with whatever felt right to him and if Merrin agreed then he knew it was okay. Merrin expressed embarrassment at the thought of being seen by her fellow soldiers as soaked as she was and he nodded in understanding. Soldiers had high expectations of those in their ranks. "You're always welcome," he assured her, keeping it to himself that he wouldn't care if she never left. There was plenty of time for them to think about living arrangements.

He couldn't wait for them to get home and he could bundle her up in the sheep pelt while she dried. The heat wave might still be at its peak, but wet fur stripped the body of its insulation and he didn't want his love catching a cold. "We should probably get going," he let out a dramatic sigh of disappointment as he disentangled himself from Merrin, but he kept his tail draped over her back and his side pressed to hers.

Exit

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